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Helpful tips for co-parenting with a difficult ex

On Behalf of | Nov 19, 2019 | Child Custody |

When a person is raising their children with a difficult ex-spouse, they may feel limited in what they can do. In fact, the frustration could make them feel like they are going crazy or not able to raise their children properly. Ohio residents who in such a situation may be interested in learning some helpful tips on how to co-parent with a difficult ex-spouse.

A toxic ex may thrive on control. They could use power struggles to manipulate their former partner and try to push their buttons to get them to lash out. Successfully co-parenting with a difficult ex-spouse has a lot more to do with not engaging than engaging. Of course, parents need to communicate to make decisions that are in the kid’s best interests. It’s important to recognize that a person has the power to determine how they will engage with a difficult ex-spouse.

Instead of reacting to negative comments, manipulation and other tactics a difficult ex-spouse may use, it’s generally better to step back from the situation. One could react by venting with a friend. Their response to their ex should take place when they feel calm and have had time to think about an appropriate response. In some cases, it may not even be necessary to respond, especially if it doesn’t pertain to parenting.

After a couple has divorced, they are not on call for each other. When an emergency arises with the children, however, co-parents need to respond right away. But it’s usually best to choose a “delay time” for responding to anything that is not an emergency.

Documenting communication is important. It’s also good to document visits with co-parents, missed payments, crossed boundaries and barging through agreements. These may be helpful in a legal setting if a parent chooses to file a court order. If a child custody dispute becomes contentious, an attorney could provide legal guidance.


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